Aysel is 16 years old and loves physics but after her father goes to jail for committing an unspeakable crime and when he mother is unable to meet her look her in the eye, she begins plotting her death.
But Aysel doesn’t want to do it alone so on a website called Suicide Partners, she finds a boy named Roman who is devastated by a family tragedy who is also looking for a partner.
Although the only thing Aysel and Roman have this suicide pact in common, they begin to form a bond that makes Aysel question her will to die. But is that the case for Roman?
This book was a hard read for me because suicide is just a hard read. So it took me a while to want to read it and to get into it.
I don’t really understand Aysel because she wants to die because she feels she knows everyone’s’ thoughts about her after her father dies. But she has a love for science, a love for her little brother, she even has a love for her father (although she hates it). So the fact that she wants to end her life was a bit confusing for me, unlike Roman who seems more anti life than Aysel.
If you get past the theme of the book it was pretty dry read. I was not expecting personality from Aysel or Roman in the beginning but I was towards the end of the book when Aysel began to see life differently. I also didn’t like the fact that Aysel’s father is a huge character in the book and he is so carelessly thrown off at the end. It felt like a easy fix for the author without having to add another 200 pages into the story.
I kept reading the book even though it was predictable. It wasn’t a shocker that Aysel fell for Roman or that she changed on her mind on the pact. Actually nothing in this book was a shocker which left me feeling kind of blank about this novel.
However, I was able to finish the book because although the author wrote on a very tough subject, she wrote it realistically and with so much honesty and rawness that to put the book down would keep you up all night.